tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37201851850627632182024-03-19T13:38:39.347-07:00La Perduta GenteJim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-73635331874162861032010-11-14T06:06:00.000-08:002010-11-14T06:24:52.768-08:00JOHNNY GOT HIS GUN by Dalton TrumboWhy didn't I come upon this novel during the Vietnam years? Not only one of the best anti-war novels, but so imaginative, so sad, so perfectly written from the perspective that War is Hell. What other perspective is there when it comes to war? Published in 1939, written by Dalton Trumbo, it is about a soldier who has lost everything in The War To End All Wards; everything that is but his mind. Reminds me of the Clancy brother's song <em>Johnny</em> I Hardly <em>Knew</em> <em>You</em>. (Thank you Jeanne Lafferty.) <br /><br />I stumbled upon this novel in a seventh period World History class taught by Mr. Jarze. On Veteran's Day all the history teachers were obliged to do something to explain the meaning of this holiday. Mr. Jarze chose a reading from this novel, and an accompanying video featuring Metallica using this novel as inspiration for their song. <br /><br />When it comes to war there are two works we all should read before supporting it, becoming part of it, and before deciding to "just let it happen, since what can we do?" <br />The first is this novel, <em>Johnny</em> <em>Got</em> <em>His</em> <em>Gun</em> by Dalton Trumbo.<br />The other is Howard Zinn's <em>Peoples'</em> <em>History</em> <em>of</em> <em>The</em> <em>United</em> <em>States</em>," or if you're not a reader Google his wonderful speech entitled <em>Holy</em> <em>Wars</em>.<br />That's all ye know on earth about war, and all ye need to know. <br />Pardon the paraphrase, Mr. Keats.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-79191662344707146342010-01-03T06:23:00.000-08:002010-01-03T06:53:52.889-08:00Yes, Virginia, There Is a FloridaMake no mistake: there is a Florida attached to the upper 47. It is a peninsula forever threatened by water; water everywhere. One of my friends said that the entire state is a landfill. Harsh. Sometimes seemingly true. There is an east coast. (Think monster hurricanes on doplar radar.) There is a west coast. (Think monster hurricanes stewing in the Gulf.) And there's a land in between already filled with interstates and travelers heading north and south, but not by train. Nothing moves by rail anymore. Wal-Mart trucks, Inc. carry all: from cattle, chattel, to junk from China and environs. Back to Florida. There are six churches to every person. Most of them in Pasco County. Is it truly a religious haven? Do I dare think that tax exemption is at the heart of this spirtual phenomenon? Someone advised me to get my Doctorate of Divinity on line, then I can touch people. Then I can rent space in a strip mall and call it a church. Then I can take offerings and pay zero taxes. You can't deny there is some spirit to that! The churches. Mostly fundamentalist. Some traditional. Some in a room of their own. I don't mind being amongst all these churches. Don't get me wrong. I just miss the cathedrals. The grandeur. But, I understand, it's difficult to build a cathedral on a slab.<br />Consider Florida before air conditoning. Don't consider mosquito coasts and malaria. They've moved south to the lower Americas. <br />Florida: once Red, now temporarily Blue; just itching to turn Red and rebel once again.<br />It is where I live. I find the book stores, the theaters, the people I enjoy. It is a diverse state. Though there aren't a lot of Main Streets. Travel Highway 19 on the west coast and town melds into town. You have to watch for the "Entering Holiday" sign stuck in front of a strip mall. But New Port Richey does have a Main Street. There's a central park of sorts. And an abandoned old home where Gloria Swanson used to live during the heyday. And on Moon Lake Road there's a windowless, stone building said to be Al Capone's hideout. No historical marker there. Just legend, imagination, sanctuary when bullets flew over Broadway. Sanctuary. Almost sounds hallowed.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-41826449078808001922009-06-13T22:46:00.000-07:002009-06-13T22:55:39.943-07:00From Panama to CambridgeIn my country of Panama it is a tradition to move out every so many years for an extended period of time. In honoring my country's tradition, I have moved to Cambridge, Massachusetts for a stay of unknown length at this time.<br />I don't mean to be secretive, but, as we say in Panama, too much information given is too much information received.<br />Wise words from the most wonderful place on earth.<br />Let's just say that I've chosen one of the more prestigious art schools for the location of my new residence.<br />I am fortunate.<br />I am surrounded by beautiful watercolors, sketches, photography, paintings and portraits.<br />Celebrated artists come here every Monday night to share in the exuberance of creation!<br />I may even grow a beard while I am here.<br />I may learn to play the lute.<br />I may decide to strive for a better translation of Tolstoy.<br />I won't be incognito, if I tell you more.<br />Perhaps those of you who really need to be in touch will persuade me to reveal my exact location.<br /><br />EduardoJim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-59413041763918693872009-04-26T10:14:00.000-07:002009-04-26T12:18:53.917-07:00ANGELICA<br /><br />I just finished reading <em>Angelica</em> by Arthur Phillips. If you love traditionally wrought fiction loaded with conflicts and final resolutions, so that the fate of all the characters is revealed by the end of the story, forget this novel. <em>Angelica</em> has been described as a cross between <em>Rashomon</em> and <em>The</em> <em>Turning</em> <em>of</em> <em>The</em> <em>Screw</em>. It is a story told by an initially unrevealed narrator. There are four segments to the novel; actually four novels within a novel. We read the first character's reality and we are left with certain, fairly fixed perspectives. Then we move on to the other three points of view, and we are suddenly never too sure of what is real, what is imagined, who's "right," who the villain is, whose narration is closer to the truth, if indeed the truth can ever be learned. So if you can't deal with irresolution, then don't even start this book.<br />But as a literary novel it certainly pleases. There are so many issues examined in this setting of Victorian society, from vivisection to male and female sexual roles, to spiritualism, to mystery, to science vs. the metaphysical that there is never a loss of interest. Occasionally the narration bogs down, particularly if you soon realize that it is headed toward a dead end of not knowing what's what. But the speculation more than makes up for the certainties we may seek. In fact, this is a novel that should be read twice, so that you can examine each point of view with a keener eye, so that you can decide on your take of events and find the narrative clues to support it. I'm not sure if the author has made it possible to do this with any certainty. But, that's exactly what he intended!Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-14769269903839831512009-03-14T08:40:00.000-07:002009-03-15T06:54:52.087-07:00Anonymous BoschBurnt Sienna<br /><br />Burnt Sienna is still sienna,<br />Singed in one of three degrees.<br />Is first the worst?<br />Or third to fear<br />When sear is no longer sienna.<br /><br /><br />Sesquicentennial<br /><br />Sesquicentennial -<br />One hundred years minus, plus a few.<br />Or else shaped into geometrical form.<br />Modified, museumed, mausoleumed;<br />More interesting than biennial<br />As puzzling as quadrihedron<br />Alas, not as bad as quasiheathen.<br />To say nothing of Tipi Hedron.<br /><br /><br />Facings<br /><br />Your impassive face speaks<br />Through my inference.<br />I read into and about it<br />In vexing speculation.<br />Oh, wear your heart upon your sleeve;<br />And show me implications, Face!<br /><br /><br />Horse Sense<br /><br />Slip shod<br />One horse shay<br />Horse poorly shod<br />Surely slips<br />The wagon breaks apart<br />And we wonder why we tumble out.<br /><br /><br />Sixteen and Counting<br /><br />Lincolnesque -<br />In form, in action, perhaps<br />Not always, exactly in fashion.<br />A quality devoutly<br />To be wished.<br />Obamaesque, Arabesque<br />Think Gettysburg, Inaugural Two -<br />Slaves whose chains are broken.<br />One man can make the center hold?<br />Bold!<br />William Butler sound retreat!<br />No, wait. The century sorely sags.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-63982007703960255592009-03-14T08:35:00.001-07:002009-03-14T08:39:41.294-07:00In Extremis<br /><br />Olive slips upon my tongue;<br />Adheres in repetition:<br />Olive, olive, O-Live.<br />Omega oils and dry martinis.<br />To live is to embrace extremes.<br />Oh, live within the middle, Fool!<br />Middlemarch, Bourgeoisie<br />Petit and otherwise.<br />Bring many martinis<br />On this happiest of hours.<br />And hold every goddam olive.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-6283387807406466672009-03-14T08:30:00.000-07:002009-03-15T05:36:32.422-07:00Anonymous BoschGermanic Rumination<br /><br /><br />Of Prussia I am confused<br />I seek old maps to find its where<br />A Google, and there it is.<br />Prussian armies, Old Kingdoms,<br />Dotted lines.<br />A northern slice of Germany?<br />Hessians, Prussians - One in same<br />Who helped, who hurt our Revolution?<br />King of Prussia, Pennsylvania<br />What's with that?<br /><br /><br />Is It the Mother Board?<br /><br />Suspend your animation,<br />An inner voice decrees.<br />Means movement and routine<br />Abide on sparse electricity.<br />Lowered amperage,<br />Weakened wattage<br />Walk, run, sleep, cry -<br />All settings default to<br />Depression<br />A brain gone slightly,<br />Awfully awry.<br /><br /><br />Puppet Tear<br /><br />I've fallen --<br />Don't you pick me up!<br />I've bootstraps<br />Here somewhere.<br />Never used, never worn<br />Unlaced --<br />Hence, I've fallen.<br /><br />Don't lift me, please!<br />There are rosebuds here<br />Upon the fallen ground<br />To gather, while I may<br />Only my goddam bootstraps<br />Are in the way.<br /><br />What's this?<br />You tack my boostraps<br />To my arms and legs<br />All straps lead to a board<br />Upon your palm.<br />Remember though,<br />I'm yours forever<br />Once a marionette.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-72269484279073399762009-03-05T12:05:00.000-08:002009-03-05T12:08:21.060-08:00Back in PanamaI am most happy to report that I am solidly back in Panama. Don't know whatever possessed me to go to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Mumbai</span>. We do drink heavily here in the Canal Zone, as you probably guessed if you've read the recent addition to Jeanne's blog. I've stopped devolving, by the way. The Panama sun has scorched the remains of any absinthe that was left in my body. It's good to be clean, straight, and back on the wagon.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-27440342642956586342009-02-23T15:03:00.000-08:002009-02-23T15:22:13.147-08:00Mumbai BoundTo all of my faithful readers, you are the first to know that it's time for a change.<br />I'm moving once again.<br />After <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">watching</span> the Oscars last night, I became inspired.<br />I have seen the movie, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Slumdog</span> Millionaire quite some time ago.<br />And I've been aware of the buzz all around it.<br />It only cost 14 million to make.<br />It has already earned over 100 million. And this is before tonight's Oscar.<br />It elevates India as the new place to go for those of us ever searching for a Promised Land here on Earth.<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Mumbai</span>. I had to place pebbles in my mouth in order to pronounce it. Ah, the Greeks knew how to settle elocution issues.<br />But it's also Bombay!! <br />This is exciting. ---Where am you headed, you ask? <br /> --- To <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Mumbai</span>! (be careful of the spewing pebbles.)<br /> ---Say where?<br /> ---To Bombay!<br /> ---But I thought you said....<br /> ---I've swallowed the last of the pebbles, fool, so from here on in, it's Bombay!<br /><br />Then, I notice the look of awe that comes over you. You like my esprit. You think, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">hhmm</span>, didn't he just settle into Panama? And I nod, but tell you I am taken up with the spirit of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Slumdog</span> Millionaire. I am ready for <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Inja's</span> sunny clime. I intend to place myself exactly in the spot where "it's at." I always do. I will be like a giant spanning bridge connecting the Old India with the New. The evolutionary link between Bombay and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Mumbai</span>!! <br /><br />I will not be discouraged by any poverty I find there. Lord knows I've seen it in Panama. Yes, but you say that there is nothing as desolate as India's downtrodden. Well, I reply. I'll just go on the Indian version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, like the young boy in the movie did. It will be life imitating art imitating life imitating reality show, imitating legitimate show, imitating what's left of the rot we have to watch on T.V.<br /><br />Ask Jeanne. She knows how much trivia my teeming brain contains. There probably won't be a love story attached to my appearing on the show like there was in the movie, but it doesn't matter, this will be the version for the rest of us. I will walk away a millionaire. I will lavish money and beauty on my little corner of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Mumbai</span>. And, by then, it will probably be time to move.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-85719168758922329092009-02-08T16:10:00.000-08:002009-02-08T16:27:43.450-08:00The View from PanamaTo all of you who have faitfully been following my Blog:<br />Yes, it has been a long time since the last entry here.<br />Why? You ask.<br />I've been moving to Panama, where I currently reside somewhere in one of the many meandering bends of The Canal.<br />I had to jump a cruise ship to establish residence.<br />I landed in a wonderful spot on The Canal.<br />Thank God we gave it back.<br />But there are so many Americans here with me that I think there is a plan afoot to reclaim it.<br />Fortunately, I am able to access the The Hampshire School of Art from my computer here.<br />I don't know what I'd do without it.<br />I am currently reading a wonderful anthology put together by Joyce Carol Oates. Love the author and you'l love her choices in the anthology. I've discovered so many excellent writers through this large volume.<br />For those of you who hang on my every word and recommendation, the official title is:<br /> <em>The</em> <em>Ecco</em> <em>Anthology</em> <em>of</em> <em>Contemporary</em> <em>American</em> <em>Short</em> <em>Fiction</em>. (Not to be confused with <em>Eccho</em> <em>La</em> <em>Barba</em>, the famous opera) Slections are by Joyce Carol Oates and Christopher R. Beha. I think he was included so that he could pick a story by Joyce Carol Oates, since it might have looked a bit egotistical for her to include herself. Although, I personally, do not see any wrong in that.<br />One of my favorite authors thanks to Kirk is Charles Baxter, and he's included.<br />Others, including Manny: Pinckney Benedict (No relation to Arnold), T.C. Boyle, whose short stories are better than his novels, E.L. Doctorow, also easier on the eye in the short story genre, Deborah Eisenberg, Louise Erdrich, William Gay, Antonya Nelson...just to name a few and not the entire contents page.<br />I'm hoping that if any of you are around The Canal in the near future, please jump ship, come visit me. I'm not difficult to find. Keep looking for the giant "I support The Hampton Street Art School" poster near the water's edge.<br />Jim, just one of La Perdutta GenteJim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-46392712590668725722008-11-13T12:13:00.000-08:002008-11-13T12:26:41.783-08:00FinnNow here's an exciting recommendation: The novel <em>Finn</em> by John Clinch. He's constructed an entire character, Huck's father, from the brief <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">references</span> to him in <em>Huckleberry</em> <em>Finn</em>. It is a literary novel full of rich symbolism. Mark Twain utilized the first person point of view. He told Huck's tale from Huck's viewpoint. In <em>Finn</em> John Clinch uses an <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">omniscient</span> narrator. Amazing thing is that it works! There are incredibly beautiful poetic passages. No wonder Clinch says that his style echoes The King James Bible and William Faulkner. The narrative is not chronological and can be confusing. I read the novel twice in order to grasp the time line, as well as to appreciate the language of the book. I belong to a book club here in Florida, but I think I was the only member truly excited by this novel. I came to the meeting with passages underlined, things to discuss, and, most importantly, questions about how did everyone else feel about Finn? He is most definitely not a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">sympathetic</span> character, but I found myself understanding him, even excusing him for some of his evil deeds. Am I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">gullible</span>? Or did the author make him complex enough to allow some sympathy? Unfortunately, we never got to discussing this in the book club. No one else took the time to fully appreciate this novel. I know that sounds elitist and a bit snobbish, but I feel that a discussion group could spend hours with this one and still be going strong. Oh well. There must be others who view the work as I do. If you're out there, let me hear from you. Oh. I forgot no one reads this blog.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-55018926059772066042008-08-21T06:58:00.000-07:002008-08-21T07:12:42.187-07:00Joyce Carol OatesI've only recently discovered Joyce Carol Oates, even though I've known of her for decades. Can't tell what prompted me to read her work now. She is probably the most prolific writer alive with, I believe, forty novels to her credit, plus short story anthologies, essays, and plays. She's a Gemini, for those interested in the astrological sign of the authors they read. I didn't know that until after I started reading her stuff. Seems I gravitate to Gemini writers. <br />The book that I found particularly intriguing is <em>The Falls.</em> Oates has a way of drawing the reader in with unusual characters in unusual situations. In <em>The Falls</em> a young man commits suicide by jumping into <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Niagara</span> Falls on his wedding night, while his wife is asleep. Didn't he ever hear of annulment or <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">divorce</span>? Seriously, it wouldn't have made a difference given the time he lived and who he was. The novel never strays from being engaging, intriguing. Oates takes risks with the plot that worked for me. There is one scene, however, that I'd love to discuss with someone else who's read this work. This book is perfect for a book club, if I belonged to one, which I don't. In Florida, the book clubs I find meet too early in the day for me. <br />The mood of<em> The Falls </em>is dark, brooding. Yet it <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">surprises</span> constantly and satisfies at the end. I won't go into plot beyond telling the opening scene.<br />I just finished <em>Beasts</em> by Joyce Carol Oates, a small novella with more characters behaving strangely, but so believably. Oates has complete confidence that the reader will "buy" the people she creates. I have absolutely no trouble suspending any disbelief when reading her work. For me there isn't much disbelief to suspend. After all, I've conquered One Dimensional living.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-87194821745452127242008-08-19T16:24:00.000-07:002008-08-19T16:43:44.660-07:00One Dimensional LivingYes, I achieved entrance into one dimensional living on Cape Cod recently. I am the first to accomplish this denial of the other dimensions. I am a nihilist at heart. Compression into one dimension is not what the body favors, trust me. All our organs, cells, tissues are used to the cozy arrangement of height, width, and depth. There is a price to pay for squeezing oneself into just one dimension: Pain, compression fractures, the bends (when you decompress), and all the other stuff that flesh is heir to. Shakespeare knew about this long ago, and that is the esoteric meaning of that quote. Nevertheless, I have experienced something that would make me do it all again in a flash: the unbearable lightness of being. I do not recommend one dimensional being for weight loss, by the way. No, there are easier ways to accomplish that: Weight Watchers, South Beach Diet, Jenny Craig, and starvation come to mind. No, ULB, the Unbearable Lightness of Being is a spiritual state and must be approached with all the caution, training, and dedication that one might give to playing a Chopin Etude, or preparing for initiation into the Masons. In another Blog entry, I will attempt to describe the Nirvana-like state of existing in one dimension and one dimension only. You would think, after all, that I wouldn't be able to recall the experience, since my brain was flattened into a virtual pancake. But, what my grey and white matter lacked in the other two dimensions, it gained in the "splat" of one dimensional existence. All one's intelligence is spread out in one gigantic splotch. Oh, the beauty and the truth and the joy! Do not attempt to do what I did! The training process is grueling. Contact the proper associations before you even dream of diminishing yourself. I am truly honored to even be here reporting to you my experience with The One. Be patient. Await more information. I forsee us all there One day soon. They also serve who only sit and wait. Ah, that is what Milton was talking about, after all!<br />Blessed be, you all.Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-63681587349693615652007-10-25T21:14:00.000-07:002007-10-25T21:52:47.127-07:00All Hallows Eve of NaNoWriMoHalloween or "<em>Samhain</em>" in Celtic lore, according to Mike Nichols, is a night that exists outside of time and , hence, it may be used to view any point in time. At no other holiday is a tarot card reading, crystal reading, or tea leaf reading so likely to succeed. What about the novels all of us are about to create?<br /><br />Is it coincidence, then, that NaNoWriMo Eve is also the same night as All Hallows Eve?<br /><br />Meditation leads me to believe not.<br /><br />Bobbing for apples may well represent the remnants of a Pagan "baptism" night call <em>seining</em>. The water-filled tub is a latter day <em>Cauldron</em> <em>of</em> <em>Regeneration</em> into which the novice's head is immersed. The fact that the participant in the folk game was usually blindfolded with hands tied behind his back also puts one in mind of a traditional <em>Craft</em> <em>initiation</em> <em>ceremony</em>. Also according to Mike Nichol's research.<br /><br />What better initiation into the craft of novel writing then having it occur on All Hallows Eve? And don't we go into it with our eyes blindfolded? Without prior preparation? Not knowing in what direction we may be headed? We fiction writers are symbolically baptized into our own Cauldron of Regeneration, and creation, during a night that exists outside of time, when our inspiration is about to be brought into time during the month of November with a higher likelihood of succeeding.<br /><br />Ponder also the oft debated: whether a man can write from a woman's point of view and vice versa. In Scotland, at least, the tradition of dressing in costume on All Hallows Eve consisted almost exclusively of cross-dressing (i.e. men dressing as women, and women as men). It seems as though ancient societies provided an opportunity for people to "try on" the role of the opposite gender for one night of the year.<br /><br />So my NaNoWriMo friends, feel free to write from whatever point of view you wish! We are beginning during an auspicious time indeed. And the above are only a few of the links NaNoWriMo Eve has with All Hallows Eve.<br /><br />Feel free to research further, and you will see that we are all truly blessed to begin our work on All Saints Day.<br /><br />Pope John Paul II said in his letter to artists: Even when they explore the darkest depths of the soul...artists give voice in a way to the universal desire for redemption.<br /><br />Thank you PJP-II for believing in <em>La</em> <em>Perduta</em> <em>Gente</em>!Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-20625763177193175632007-10-21T10:06:00.000-07:002007-10-21T10:26:29.589-07:00They're back.Maybe it's the RaspbeRRy SeltZer that fizzes my brain. I don't know. Several days ago I thought I put the bearded ladies idea to rest for a while. I did come up with two very lovely pictures, didn't I? The text wasn't so bad either. Yeah, it was time to move on to other subjects, whims, and obsessions. What better way to forget the ladies con le barbe then to read some short stories. I picked up an anthology by Ryan Boudinot, which I'd bought several months ago, but hadn't had time to consider.<br />The third story is entitled <em>Bee</em> <em>Beard</em>. <em>I was hoping it was about a man</em>. But the first paragraph confirmed my fears<em>:</em><br /><em> Bette wore the bee beard to work on a Tuesday...At first I mistook the low buzzing for ambient noise from my computer monitor or a fluorescent light fixture...Bette wore what I had come to secretly call her Star Trek uniform, a hideous white suit jacket with too-pointy collars. From her face hung a beard of bees..."You like?" she said, standing, pivoting in a circle.</em><br /><em> "Aren't they going to miss the hive?" I said.</em><br /><em> "Yeah, they'll want to eat, so I brought plenty of honey," Bette said.</em><br />Now this story continues: Bette and Scott go to an up-scale restaurant, and while, eating, one of the bees from Bette's beard flies across the table, bites Scott, who goes into anaphylactic shock and has to be rushed to the hospital for emergency treatment.<br /> That prevents Scott from sleeping with Bette who's about to become his boss. The next morning his co-worker Dan arrives at work saying: "I'm a little out of it this morning. Late night, if you know what I mean," Dan says, his face dripping with bees.<br /><br />Does anyone need further proof of the power of the bearded lady? With hair or bees. Oy. What a world, what a world.<br /><br /><em> </em>Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-66979694756851890312007-10-20T12:14:00.000-07:002007-10-20T12:45:05.886-07:00The Kirk (Us) ReviewsI believe blogs are part of The Aquarian Age. Ego plays no part. Or shouldn't. So, when I come upon another blog site with relevant information, I will be the first to recommend it. It is necessary for all of you currently visiting my site to immediately blog out to Another Hundred Crimes blog site and read the reviews of Kirk Davis from Amazon.com. Then, after reading them, you also have to write to Kirk urging him to quit his current job and permanently compose reviews, so that all of us will feel a little less lost in this confusing consumer-oriented society. If you believe, as I do, that it is everyone's mission to transform the lost people (including ourselves), then you will heed my advice to go straight to the Amazon.com reviews and spare yourself a few thousand years in Hell. Laughter is antidote to anything diabolical. Thank you Kirk(us) for your reviews, and for allowing us to work off serious karma.<br /><br />One of a thousand admirersJim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3720185185062763218.post-18463399443076601502007-10-16T17:59:00.000-07:002008-12-11T04:40:32.072-08:00Bearded Ladies<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjow-cjGz3SpS26fgqbuhoR7R_2DiG-PBoqo7LnqVQFYt3tUoDDXOrasENG9tt8ghSEE8ppWdA4Xcg1u8r9VbgF1-Rho4G20YfAibpV1GcWEJ07Xodi3yKw6RHeHNPqq93o_cKdRHEe4V0/s1600-h/josephine7ow-735897.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5122109891369585186" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjow-cjGz3SpS26fgqbuhoR7R_2DiG-PBoqo7LnqVQFYt3tUoDDXOrasENG9tt8ghSEE8ppWdA4Xcg1u8r9VbgF1-Rho4G20YfAibpV1GcWEJ07Xodi3yKw6RHeHNPqq93o_cKdRHEe4V0/s320/josephine7ow-735897.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><div>Before I get to the topic at hand, the topic at chin, I want to take a sip of Ritz brand <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">RaspBeRRy</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">SeltZer</span>. For those of you not so fortunate to be living in this small segment of the west coast of Florida, you may have to start with a more well-known seltzer </div><div>such as Poland Springs in New England or Perrier in France. The seltzer is a preface to submersion into this whirlpool of consideration: Bearded Ladies. A topic not often explored. A topic heretofore of circus sideshows and the like. Here we are delving <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_rOOWc0xAjUYikZOOrVlnXrdyj8o0R-6ioyLvKreRj5HrINYZLtRFaMYdFJRw1e42pLPnGme5e1HcPUagW9ZQN-r7omfoIWoMCrclRVoUNNk2J95KTWX2G9byI4P0Czhxozqk8ifGYJw/s1600-h/BeardedWoman5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5122120740456974898" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 205px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 353px" height="334" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_rOOWc0xAjUYikZOOrVlnXrdyj8o0R-6ioyLvKreRj5HrINYZLtRFaMYdFJRw1e42pLPnGme5e1HcPUagW9ZQN-r7omfoIWoMCrclRVoUNNk2J95KTWX2G9byI4P0Czhxozqk8ifGYJw/s320/BeardedWoman5.jpg" width="205" border="0" /></a>into the very soul of the bearded lady. The psyche, if you will. The hirsute history of the most bending of genders. This is both a tantalizing preview and a warning. The topic is not for the weak hearted or feeble minded. It is a bracing endeavor. It is looking at something intriguing without flinching, without allowing the mind-as-censor to overtake your interest and further investigation. Think of me as your ring master, your intellectual ring master: one who calls your attention to the center ring where the bearded ladies are spotlighted. Not as freaks. Not as sideshow. But as the Main Attraction. As Boris Karloff used to say on one of those old T.V. shows: "As sure as my name is Boris <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Karloff</span>, THIS is a Thriller!" </div><div> </div><div>For those of you who are still reading, still hungry for the information promised: I refer you to the upcoming production of the musical <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">LaBarba</span>. Never in musical theater has a subject been explored with such depth. The music has been called brilliant, but it is the <em>book</em> of the musical that is also without equal in the annals of modern, or for that matter, ancient theater. </div><div>In two or three acts the musical examines the life of one woman who desires the beard, obsesses over the beard, dons the beard, and faces the consequences, both expected and unintended. </div><div>We witness the transformation both literally and internally (and cosmically, I might add) of what it means for the female to deliberately defy natural law (and one might also argue God), cut and paste the beard (not only on her computer screen, but on her flesh) and then ultimately find the magic potion that enables her to actually grow the beard that takes her to the existential and intrinsic elements of the human condition. </div><div>We witness it all: the longing (wonderful arias), the defiance of social mores (exquisite soliloquies), the beard worn in private (facing the shame and overcoming it), and finally the exit from the closet into the sunlight, the world (unforgettable arias, duets, production numbers, and tragic <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">recitativo</span>.) </div><div>And we know that, as before, for now and ever there will be bearded ladies in our midst. Never again will you view your mother, your wife, your sister, your aunt, <em>any</em> woman again without wondering: <em>does</em> <em>she</em> <em>don</em>? You will sing the appropriate section of the opera and fully know what the beard means to some women. And life will never be the same. (Act Two: <em>La</em> <em>Vita</em> <em><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">transforma</span></em> from <em>La</em> <em><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Barba</span>.)</em></div><div></div>Jim Calandrillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04064211743184212131noreply@blogger.com3